That’s how I’ve been feeling when it comes to my running lately. Ever since the marathon, I’ve not been in a regular running routine. Of course, I know that I’m not supposed to go back full throttle right after one but I do think I’m supposed to be running a little more than I am.(Jason went for a 12 mile long run last week….) My normal running time has gotten interrupted lately by my 2 yr old that has decided not to go to sleep until really late most nights. My husband helps me out with her but can’t until he’s gotten our 6 yr old to bed. (Zach says he can’t go to sleep without his daddy lying beside him. 🙂 )
I guess things felt extra bad yesterday because I hadn’t been able to run since last Tuesday or Wednesday and I was feeling the grouchiness emerge. On top of that, I was STARVING yesterday, all day!! It’s one thing to feel that way the day after a long run because I feel like I can pat myself on the back and say, “Eat up, you’ve earned it.” But when I’ve done nothing that day or the day before, it’s not a good feeling to feel like my stomach is a bottomless pit. Last night, after Jason got Zach to sleep, I was still in bed with Zoe, who was still not asleep (but I had been). He told me he’d take over with her so I could get my run in. At that moment, I didn’t care if I ever ran another step. I was frustrated, not at Jason, not at Zoe…. I just was in general. In my best Eeyore impersonation, I declared, “I think I’m just going to give up on all of this. I think I’ll just see how much weight I can gain.” Of course, about 10 minutes later I had my running clothes on and ran 4 miles of frustration off.
I didn’t really mean that I was going to give up and my new goal was to eat as much as possible. I think what I really meant was I’m scared to death that this whole running thing is suddenly going to stop one day and I will turn back into the person that I used to hate looking at in the mirror. Honestly, I can’t go down that road again….I won’t let myself. I think that’s why I start feeling like the wheels are coming off the wagon if my routine is thrown off.
What I’m saying is that I’m quitting at being a quitter. It’s silly for me to let a few days get me down and instead of bellyaching and moping, I’m going to do what I can when I can. This isn’t the first time I’ve felt this way but I wanted to share it with you this time. I wanted you to know (in case you didn’t already) that if you feel like this, you aren’t the only one and you can get back on track. Don’t let a few bad days ruin a good thing.
I’ve got a 5k race this weekend and then the next Saturday is the Crescent City Classic 10k. I haven’t trained as much as I have in the past for it but I know I can run 6 miles, I know it’ll be fun and I know if I skipped out on it I’d really be let down.
I feel much better today, btw. It’s a good thing I waited to blog about it now instead of doing it yesterday like I thought about doing.
I’m going to do what I can, with what I have, with the time I’m given and I’m going to be grateful for it. 🙂
P.S. Don’t forget to enter my Train Like a Mother giveaway!
22 responses to “I Quit!”
After losing 80lbs and running 7 half marathons and various other shorter races (and training for my first full…which is this Sunday! Gulp!) you don’t know how often I think something along those lines. I can’t get it together anymore, I quit! And I don’t….but thanks for the reminder that I’m not alone. 🙂
Congratulations on your weight loss and on your running achievements!! Good luck on Sunday and welcome to the marathon club (a little early)!
Great blog! It’s awesome that we get to start a new day each day, and what happened yesterday is gone. The devil wants all of us to give up, and uses our weaknesses to invoke fear. BUT GOD! Remember that “Greater is He that lives in me, then he that’s in this world.” You are awesome Gina, and He has plenty of miles for you! KEEP MOVING FORWARD! 🙂
Thank you so much for that reminder Tiffany! It almost seems silly how I felt yesterday but it was real at the time. I know I’ll have other days/weeks that won’t be great but I know there will be many more good than bad. God bless you my sweet friend! 🙂
Sometimes the hardest part of running is putting the shoes on and taking a few steps.. 🙂 Great job! I have been feeling the blahs lately too..I just try to trudge on until I shake it off 🙂
“I think what I really meant was I’m scared to death that this whole running thing is suddenly going to stop one day and I will turn back into the person that I used to hate looking at in the mirror.” –
-This is exactly how I feel! But I have been listening to this song(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k9jid16vzKY) on my ipod and repeating it when I feel down!
I have shown your blog to my children and passed it along to my friends. Keep up the encouragement! My friend Esther and I will be at the Classic too. Hope to finally meet, considering that race is how I found you!
Thank you, Michelle! I hope we’ll get to see each other there too! Great song, btw!! 🙂
These feelings could also be the post-marathon blues. It happens to the best of us, but the beauty of it is, you know you can’t stop nor will you. Good luck on your races!
Thank you. 🙂 Someone on my FB page mentioned that it might be that too. Weird to think about but very likely. Jason has turned his focus to the half marathon in May in H’burg and hasn’t had the same trouble. Time for me to do that too, I think.
the whole exercise and running thing is a constant struggle for me, but I just keep working at it. Putting one foot in front of the other, as often as we can, really is good enough. Kudos to you for getting out there even when you didn’t feel like it. Making the decision to go for a run is usually the hardest part.
Gina, I’m so happy you are not really quitting! 🙂 Even after short races, I have felt the “what’s the point” of running and had to fight the voice that tells me that it doesn’t mean anything. But I have a list, “Why I Run”, that helps out during these times. Fighting the doldrums can be a great hill that is difficult to get over, but runners have many hills they have to get over and we are stronger for them. Thank you for this post. It is always helpful to know others go through the same things and overcome them. Best wishes on your next race.
I am glad you are not really quitting! Ironically when I feel this way I just run and it makes me feel better!
I am glad you are not really quitting! Ironically when I feel like this I just run and I usually feel better!
You are so right! A streak of not-so-good days does not warrant throwing in the towel completely. We move forward, we fall down, we dust ourselves off, and we get back up again. It makes the victory and satisfaction so much sweeter because it isn’t easy. Rock on, Gina!!
I can SO relate to this post! It seems that lately so many things have lined up to derail my usual workout routine, plus (like you!) I keep having what I call “hungry days”. I keep hoping I can push past this slump and get *moving* again!
Best wishes to you & thanks for posting this. Love your blog!
After my last marathon, I just quit. I did two fulls last year and was burnt out. So I took some time off, gain like 15 pounds, and relaxed. That was back in Oct. I finally got back to running last month. I’m having fun at it now. Running more short races while training for a June half. Weight isn’t coming off as fast as it went on, but I’m not going to put any pressure on myself. It’s all about having fun and enjoying running again.
I think every one goes through what I call “runners rut”, and I think it is all part of it. Especially, if running is what primarily helped you lose the weight…like it did me. I think like that too. If I don’t run, I am going to gain the weight back. If I don’t run off what I eat, I am going to gain the weight back. I have that like negative chat with myself all the time, and I am glad some else feels that way too. Now, I will get tell the negative committee to sit down and shut up. LOL!
But girl, if you are tired, you of all people, deserve to be tired taking care of 5 kids….dang. I am tired for you.
Thank you! I’m hoping I’ll perk up soon! 🙂
You will just give yourself a minute to relax, and get back into it. You trained so hard for the marathon, so it is no wonder why you feel burnt out
Gina, you are doing great! After a long time of preparing for a full marathon to have it “done” sometimes leave you with an emptiness. I mean, there’s no push to maintain that schedule. I love the way you turned your thoughts around to be what you want them to be.
I totally understand about the “quitting”. I’ve been going through a tough bronchitis/allergy time, for over a month and is still hanging on, which has about stopped my running completely. I mean, only a run here and there and NONE were quality!! It’s quite frustrating. I’m still in that situation and am trying to pull myself out of it. Wish we could do a run together off and on…that might help with the down times. Thanks for posting your good and bad times. I do the same. I love your blog! Good luck on the Crescent City Classic. It might just be what you need to pull you completely through the slump.
Thank you Robbie! I was sick there for a while too and I think it was from my immune system being weak from marathon training. It was so hard to run feeling like that. I hope you’ll start feeling better very soon!! I’d love to run with you sometime. My schedule is so wacky right now that my runs seem to take place when everyone else is about to go to bed, lol! Thank you for your encouraging words. It means so much!
We definitely all have times when we feel like that! I sure you will get back in your running groove in no time! thanks for following my blog by the way!
Sandra (Organic Runner Mom)